JOIN THE GANG
We're hiring wizards. Accounting experience preferred but not required.
Open Positions
- Senior Spell Architect — Develop and deploy catrips, hexes, and incantations. Obamanomicon experience preferred.
- Professional Money Stacker — Must be able to go band 4 band with rival gangs.
- Bee Liaison Officer — Manage relationships with local apiary collectives. Must love bees.
- Orb Maintenance Technician — Keep the Orb operational. No touching without permission.
- Quarterly Report Specialist — File all spells and coordinate with owls.
- Threat Level Coordinator — Maintain our signature purple threat level. Graphic design skills a plus.
Qualifications
We're looking for individuals who possess:
- A strong commitment to legalizing nuclear bombs
- Fundamental understanding of bees making honey
- Passion for spellcasting
- Ability to work with birdfolk (owls)
- Willingness to respect the Orb's autonomy
- Flexible schedule (shadow government hours)
Application Process
To apply, send the following to [email protected]:
- List of spells you can cast
- A cover letter explaining your commitment to SWAG
- Three references (at least one must be an owl)
- Your credit card information
- Money
Benefits Package
- Competitive salary
- Access to the Orb (supervised)
- Quarterly pizza parties with heads of state
- Access to forbidden tomes
- Swag robes
- Health insurance (Includes Dental)
- Nuclear Bombs (Coming soon!)
Equal Opportunity Statement: We do not discriminate based on (robe) color, age, disability, size, or any other status protected by federal, state, or wizard law. We do discriminate based on swag. Sponsored by the shadow government.